Friend and secret keeper

Its so long since I wrote my last blog. Not that I don't have anything to write... Issue is time and time alone... How can I do all those things I love to do or hate to do but have to do in mere 24 hours? 1440 minutes? 86400 seconds? Impossible! That is my problem! Now, what I want to write today is about friends or friendship. I do not have any structure in my mind, but writing as I think.

I was just reading a forward today which goes like this....

" Sometimes in life, you find a special friend...

Someone who changes your life just by being part of it...

Someone who makes you laugh until you can't stop...

Someone who makes you believe that there really is good in the world.

Someone who convinces you that there really is an unlocked door just waiting for you to open it...... "

Hmm.. Ya, definitely. Some people come into your life and they stay! Some move on to find better things in life. No matter what happens, you are never the same. You may say that change is natural way of life and you can defend it and go on. Yes, but you willingly change for some people and you are forced in other cases. Whether the change made is making you a better person is the question here, I think. Positive influences and negative ones, exactly makes all the difference.

I have had many friends in my life. Never had a very close one... May be I never allowed anyone to come closer. May be, I was scared of sharing my inner most thoughts with anybody other than me, myself! But then all of us are not like that. People share everything, including the personal fears. Sharing makes the relationship better? I don't know... I can only say - May be! But then, most of my friends thought of me as their secret keeper. They shared their inner most thoughts and fears with me. I was careful with all those information. I was the guard, the secret keeper! People trusted me and I never broke the trust. My problem with sharing my issues may have been routed from this secret keeper business. If people trust me as their secret keeper, how can I find another secret keeper for myself. May be I never had the time to find one after solving everyones problems. May be I thought that their problems are so large and complex in comparison to mine and it is not worth the effort.

It is nice to be friends with so many people. Listen to people, help them overcome their fears, fight with them, make up and all the while observing the very basic human behaviour. Slowly you can even identify their feelings without words. As one of my friends say, identify them through their smell! If you ask me whether it is a burden, I don't have an answer. But then, sometimes you have to deal with jealousy, selfishness and above all possesiveness. I really don't care too much for these three areas especially when I'm a party to it! But then again, these also are a part and parcel of everday life.

Anyway, I remained as a friend to all, but without having a best friend. Not that I' m complaining. But then, sometimes you feel that you are becoming a complaint box. Hmm.. all for friendship! And it is one of the most beautiful relationships! A relationship to cheish!